This article was written after the author was unexpectedly requested to referee an amateur football match at Opera Estate. Being his first attempt and with no prior experience, preparation nor a whistle that he could possibly use, the author did a somewhat horrible job. An experience that he’d never want to go through, ever again. Allowing play to go on when it’s an offside, allowing foul throws, inappropriate calls and not stamping enough authority, were just a few of the mistakes that he had made. Dealing with temperamental players, being called names, making calls under pressure wasn’t something that he’s used to.

Embrace Disgrace

If that was a lesson from God himself to show me how incomplete of a person I am, boy, that was one helluva tough in-your-face kinda lesson. I could have scurried away in cowardice, discontinued or abandoned the game, but I didn’t. Heh, but for sure, I am glad it’s over now. After putting some thought to it, as bad as it may be, I decided not to fret too much about it and vent my frustrations out at someone, but rather take some pointers out of it instead.

No point crying over spilled milk. (Yeap, crying over it wont help, but cleaning it up will)

From that incident, I’ve realized that I am one who glaringly lacks self-belief, assertion, confidence, self-esteem, command, firmness, leadership and influence. (Oh my, can’t be that much right?) But yes, it is that much. The sooner I begin to accept it, the better. And I’d better figure out some ways to improve on those aspects real soon.

This is the reason why I felt I shouldn’t fret over it for too long:

Life is as bad or as good as you want it to be.

If you’re the type who always have negative thoughts and interpret everything in the world negatively, then yes, your life would never be filled with joy even though you’re one who earns millions of dollars each year. On the other hand, if you earn a meager 650 bucks a month but seek joy in the simplest of things, have a constant positive outlook towards everything and doesn’t get worked up that easily, then it’s a life worth living.

The point I d wish to put across is about one’s perspective towards life and how one views it. It’s about; whether you can extract anything good from something bad that has happened. It’s about using it to your advantage. And always remember, everything happens for a reason. If it has happened, so be it. God probably has something else in store for you, not always the way you want it, but probably what’s best for you.

Okay I’ll use myself as an example.

18 January 2007. The night I shall never forget. It was during a splendid game of football at Simei Street Soccer Court, our team was on a roll and winning a couple of games. And never would I have thought it would happen. While having possession of the ball, I strafed on the left side of the court and did a sharp directional change. My right knee suddenly buckled and there was a loud bone crunching “crack” sound that came out from the knee. It felt like a dislocation. I crumbled to the ground almost instantly, clutching my knee in agony. I knew it had to be something serious as the pain was excruciating and it just wouldn’t go away.

(And...days later when I went to the doctor...)

“Diagnosis - Full tear of the anterior cruciate ligament and the lateral meniscus”. That’s what I saw in the orthopaedic doctor’s “scribbles” on the report at least. (Darn these doctors need to do something about their handwriting) He said it’s an injury similar to Michael Owen’s. I’ll be back in action in 2008. Pretty long, but I gotta bear with it.

But as I soon found out, there are good things that came along with the injury. The surgery that was needed to be done on the knee would be covered by NS (great, if not I would have had to fork out about $ 2000). Hopefully they’ll cover the physiotherapy and rehab thereafter as well. And furthermore, since I’m downgraded to PES C, I wouldn’t have such a hard time when I serve national service as the activities are less strenuous.

Also, I was finding it hard to get a temporary job after I graduated from TP. The jobs that were offered to me required constant moving and carrying of heavy stuff, so I had to reject them due to my injury. And I never got any replies for any data entry jobs.

However, it was the right choice to reject those offers as I soon got accepted to work temporarily at KKH laboratory, the place where I had my internship programme during my days in TP. Knowing virtually everyone there, it felt really good. And my colleagues at histo are just great people to have around. It was more than what I could ask for.

And, at least I’m earning a bit while waiting for NS, of course. Heh.

So..yea. The injury was kind of a blessing in disguise for me. Even that crappy match that I had to referee. Learnt what was lacking in my character.

And as for everyone else out there - there’s always something good that you can take with you out of a bad experience. You may not see it now, but possibly in the later stages of your life. It’s all about your perspective.

“There’s no point whining over something bad that’s happened. It makes you weak. Get over it, fix it, or perhaps find something positive out of it.”